Start with a significant quote that will frame your essay argument.
Or, start with the author and title and create a frame for your argument.
THESIS: the last one or two lines of the essay. It is your argument. It is the spinal cord. It is the needed ingredient. Without it, you fail….
EX: “Next time there would be no mercy.” This sentiment is the crux of William Golding’s novel, Lord of the Flies, which examines the inherent evil that resides in every human being. Using an isolated island (setting) and creating two main characters who are at constant odds with each other (characterization), he is able to weave a story that scrutinizes human beings’ pursuit of desire rather than reason.
Body one – a specific technique that furthers the thesis.
TOPIC SENTENCE: To illustrate this evasive cruelty, Golding isolates a group of coming-of age boys on an island, which also develops into a significant symbol in the play. QUOTE HERE. ANALYSIS HERE – why is this connected to the thesis. The isolation allows the boys a freedom in which they are able to explore the consequence of acting on desire. This is symbolic, as Golding is using the setting to comment on the duality of humanity; if given freedom from (society) societal constructs, desire takes precedence.
Body two – a second technique that furthers the thesis.
TOPIC SENTENCE: To further illuminate/elucidate/develop Golding’s purpose, two characters vie for the position of leader. Ralph, the democratically elected leader, and Jack, the take by force boy who sets the dictum of the island, “next time there would be no mercy.” QUOTE HERE. ANALYSIS HERE – why is this connected to the thesis?
This Body thing goes on FOREVER until you develop your thesis. There is no predetermined amount of body paragraphs.
Conclusion – Ultimately, so what? Why is the author writing about this? How does it relate to the whole book, the whole world? WRITING RUBRIC
This is the rubric I use to evaluate writing. Please become familiar with it, as it will help guide your writing practices, as it does my own.
Excellent 90-100
Good 80-90
Needs Improvement 70-80
Unacceptable - 69 or below
CONTENT
Argument
Thesis
A clear statement of the main conclusion of the paper.
The thesis is obvious, but there is no single clear statement of it.
The thesis is present, but must be uncovered from the text of the paper.
There is no thesis.
Support/evidence
The evidence clearly and masterfully supports the thesis, and the author is aware of how his/her argument is furthered by the evidence, using specific examples from the text and connecting those examples to the thesis. The evidence given is true.
The evidence supports the thesis, and the author is aware of the general kind of support they provide their argument. Examples from the text are used and are generally connected back to the thesis. The evidence given is true.
The evidence somewhat supports the thesis, but the author is not aware of the kind of support they provide. Some examples may be used but without specific purpose of supporting the thesis.
The evidence does not support the thesis. Or, if there is evidence, it is false.
Understanding
Text
The paper contains highly accurate and precise summarization, description and/or paraphrasing of text. The paper uses appropriate textual support for these.
The summarization, description and/or paraphrasing of text is fairly accurate and precise, and has textual support, but other passages may have been better choices.
The summarization, description and/or paraphrasing of text is fairly accurate, but not precise, and the textual support is inappropriate.
The summarization, description and/or paraphrasing of text is inaccurate and/or has no textual support.
Analysis
The paper presents clear arguments to develop the thesis.
The paper presents arguments to develop the thesis.
The arguments to develop the thesis are unclear at times.
The arguments in the paper do not develop the thesis.
Synthesis
The paper successfully integrates all relevant parts from the text/texts into a coherent whole. The connections between the parts are clear and insightful.
The paper integrates most relevant parts from the text/texts into a mostly coherent whole. The connections between the parts are generally clear.
The paper integrates some parts from the text/texts into a somewhat coherent whole. The connections between the parts are somewhat unclear.
The parts to be integrated are not clear and/or relevant. The connections between the parts are unclear.
Evaluation
Argument
The paper evaluates the argument in question (thesis) by masterfully using the text, several valid outside sources, and the author's own researched viewpoint.
The paper evaluates the argument in question by using the text and several valid outside sources.
The paper evaluates the argument in question by using the text and may or may not include sources.
The paper does not evaluate the argument in question.
Position
The paper not only takes a position, but evaluates the position thoroughly, including exploring counter-arguments.
The paper clearly takes a position and supports it with internal consistency.
The paper does not clearly take a position and consistency is lacking.
The paper does not take a position.
CREATION
Thesis
Thesis is original, interesting, and relevant.
The thesis is interesting and relevant.
The thesis is slightly off-topic, obviously true (or false), or not really worth writing about.
The thesis is totally irrelevant.
Examples
Examples are original, relevant, insightful, and well-used.
Examples are original, relevant, and well-used.
Examples are unoriginal, only somewhat relevant, and/or not well-used.
Examples are missing, irrelevant an/or misused
Alternative Positions
Previously unmentioned alternative positions are explored.
Alternative positions are explored.
Alternative positions are mentioned but not explored.
Alternative positions are ignored.
STYLE
Clarity
All sentences are complete and grammatical. Clear awareness of sentence structure, word choice, transitions and verb use. Good, clear examples are used to illuminate concepts and issues. Information (names, facts, etc.) is accurate. Paper has been spell-checked and proofread, and has no errors, and no rhetorical questions or slang.
All sentences are complete and grammatical. Awareness of sentence structure, word choice, transitions and verb use. Examples are clear. Information (names, facts, etc.) is accurate. Paper has been spell-checked and proofread, and has very few errors, and no rhetorical questions or slang.
A few sentences are incomplete and/or ungrammatical. Lacks awareness and purpose in regards to sentence structure, word choice, transitions and verb use. Examples are not clear. Information (names, facts, etc.) is mostly accurate. Paper has several spelling errors, rhetorical questions and/or uses of slang.
Many sentences are incomplete and/or ungrammatical. Minimal awareness of sentence structure, word choice, transitions and verb use. Information (names, facts, etc.) is inaccurate. Paper has many spelling errors, rhetorical questions and/or uses of slang.
ORGANIZATION
Introduction
Thesis is clear, and contained in the introduction. The topic is introduced with minimal fanfare
Thesis is contained in the introduction. The topic is introduced with little fanfare.
Thesis is not contained in the introduction. The topic is introduced with too much fanfare.
Only the topic is introduced, with no description of the paper. Or, the paper is described inaccurately.
Body
It is very easy to follow the argument. Analysis of the argument/text is explicit and how it supports the thesis is also explicit.
It is generally easy to follow the argument. Analysis of the argument/text is clear and how it supports the thesis is also clear.
It is somewhat difficult to follow the argument. Analysis is somewhat unclear.
It is impossible to follow the argument. Analysis is completely unclear.
Conclusion
The paper uses the conclusion to tie up loose ends. It considers the implications the thesis.
The paper uses the conclusion to tie up some loose ends, but combines this with a restatement of the introduction.
The conclusion is merely a restatement of the introduction.
The conclusion is missing.
*adapted from Mara Harrell, Carnegie Mellon University Strong Verbs to use in analytical writing
Augments Asserts Argues
Contradicts Critiques Cultivates Challenges Converges Contrasts
Determines Demonstrates Disproves Diverges Distinguishes Delineates
Emerges Examines Exploits Enhances Evaluates Emphasizes
Formulates Focuses
Generates
Incorporates Illustrates Incites Justifies Manifests Maintains
Negates
Outlines
Posits Proposes Permeates Pervades
Qualifies Questions
Represents Relates Refutes Resolves
Signifies Substantiates Shapes Saturates Surmises
Validates Verifies Editing Key and Writing Tips (taken from www.yale.edu)
Redundancy (RED)
Avoid using the same word/expression multiple times in the same paragraph.
Avoid using redundant synonyms: “Schaffer’s writing and prose is terrible.”
Passive Voice (PV)
The passive voice allows the writer to avoid saying who did what, which are crucial questions for
historians. Watch out for the passive voice, often lurking in conjunction with the verb to be.
Passive: The cane was harvested.
Active: The field workers hacked down the cane.
Passive: The decision to add beef fat to the cookies was made last week.
Active: Last week, the pastry chef decided to add fat to the cookies
[To be] + noun; adjective; gerund (i.e. –ing words as nouns]; preposition = often OK
[To be] + verb = usually NOT OK
Verb Tense (VT)
When discussing a text as a text per so (tone, structure) or your own interpretation --> use the
present tense (“Anderson’s text is an incomprehensible rant”)
Linking Verbs (LV)
Although linking verbs are often useful and sometimes necessary, try not to use them too frequently.
Run-on Sentences (R-O) or Incomplete Sentences (INC)
Avoid run-on sentences. Sometimes long sentences are useful and necessary, but be careful of run-ons
(two independent clauses not distinguished within the same sentence). Tip: Vary your sentence
structure (after a few long sentences, try using a short, simple sentence for emphasis and force).
Remember, there are three ways to split up a run-on: a period, a comma and conjunction, a semi-colon:
Incorrect: The Cult of Washington emerged in the late eighteenth century, people were excited.
Correct: The Cult of Washington emerged in the late eighteenth century. People were excited.
Correct: The Cult of Washington emerged in the late eighteenth century, and people were excited.
Correct: The Cult of Washington emerged in the late eighteenth century; people were excited.
Note that “however” is NOT a conjunction:
Incorrect: George Washington cut down the tree, however he refused to tell a lie about it.
Correct: George Washington cut down the tree. However, he refused to tell a lie about it.
Correct: George Washington cut down the tree; however, he refused to tell a lie about it.
Don’t ever write an incomplete sentence! Have a subject and a verb.
Skills to Improve Writing
Writing Outline
Intro
THESIS: the last one or two lines of the essay.
It is your argument. It is the spinal cord. It is the needed ingredient. Without it, you fail….
EX: “Next time there would be no mercy.” This sentiment is the crux of William Golding’s novel, Lord of the Flies, which examines the inherent evil that resides in every human being. Using an isolated island (setting) and creating two main characters who are at constant odds with each other (characterization), he is able to weave a story that scrutinizes human beings’ pursuit of desire rather than reason.
Body one – a specific technique that furthers the thesis.
TOPIC SENTENCE: To illustrate this evasive cruelty, Golding isolates a group of coming-of age boys on an island, which also develops into a significant symbol in the play.
QUOTE HERE.
ANALYSIS HERE – why is this connected to the thesis. The isolation allows the boys a freedom in which they are able to explore the consequence of acting on desire. This is symbolic, as Golding is using the setting to comment on the duality of humanity; if given freedom from (society) societal constructs, desire takes precedence.
Body two – a second technique that furthers the thesis.
TOPIC SENTENCE: To further illuminate/elucidate/develop Golding’s purpose, two characters vie for the position of leader. Ralph, the democratically elected leader, and Jack, the take by force boy who sets the dictum of the island, “next time there would be no mercy.”
QUOTE HERE.
ANALYSIS HERE – why is this connected to the thesis?
This Body thing goes on FOREVER until you develop your thesis. There is no predetermined amount of body paragraphs.
Conclusion – Ultimately, so what? Why is the author writing about this? How does it relate to the whole book, the whole world?
WRITING RUBRIC
This is the rubric I use to evaluate writing. Please become familiar with it, as it will help guide your writing practices, as it does my own.
Strong Verbs to use in analytical writing
Augments Asserts Argues
Contradicts Critiques Cultivates Challenges Converges Contrasts
Determines Demonstrates Disproves Diverges Distinguishes Delineates
Emerges Examines Exploits Enhances Evaluates Emphasizes
Formulates Focuses
Generates
Incorporates Illustrates Incites Justifies
Manifests Maintains
Negates
Outlines
Posits Proposes Permeates Pervades
Qualifies Questions
Represents Relates Refutes Resolves
Signifies Substantiates Shapes Saturates Surmises
Validates Verifies
Editing Key and Writing Tips (taken from www.yale.edu)
Redundancy (RED)
Avoid using the same word/expression multiple times in the same paragraph.
Avoid using redundant synonyms: “Schaffer’s writing and prose is terrible.”
Passive Voice (PV)
The passive voice allows the writer to avoid saying who did what, which are crucial questions for
historians. Watch out for the passive voice, often lurking in conjunction with the verb to be.
Passive: The cane was harvested.
Active: The field workers hacked down the cane.
Passive: The decision to add beef fat to the cookies was made last week.
Active: Last week, the pastry chef decided to add fat to the cookies
[To be] + noun; adjective; gerund (i.e. –ing words as nouns]; preposition = often OK
[To be] + verb = usually NOT OK
Verb Tense (VT)
When discussing a text as a text per so (tone, structure) or your own interpretation --> use the
present tense (“Anderson’s text is an incomprehensible rant”)
Linking Verbs (LV)
Although linking verbs are often useful and sometimes necessary, try not to use them too frequently.
Run-on Sentences (R-O) or Incomplete Sentences (INC)
Avoid run-on sentences. Sometimes long sentences are useful and necessary, but be careful of run-ons
(two independent clauses not distinguished within the same sentence). Tip: Vary your sentence
structure (after a few long sentences, try using a short, simple sentence for emphasis and force).
Remember, there are three ways to split up a run-on: a period, a comma and conjunction, a semi-colon:
Incorrect: The Cult of Washington emerged in the late eighteenth century, people were excited.
Correct: The Cult of Washington emerged in the late eighteenth century. People were excited.
Correct: The Cult of Washington emerged in the late eighteenth century, and people were excited.
Correct: The Cult of Washington emerged in the late eighteenth century; people were excited.
Note that “however” is NOT a conjunction:
Incorrect: George Washington cut down the tree, however he refused to tell a lie about it.
Correct: George Washington cut down the tree. However, he refused to tell a lie about it.
Correct: George Washington cut down the tree; however, he refused to tell a lie about it.
Don’t ever write an incomplete sentence! Have a subject and a verb.